Roger’s PROFANISAU

An Update of Britain’s Favourite Lexicon of Filth and Profanity

Action Man’s toboggan n. A substantial and fast-moving, lozenge-shaped Sir Douglas, not dissimilar in size & texture to the popular doll’s gravity-assisted snow-traversing accessory. Andrex worthy adj. Descriptive of a highly satisfying dump that one has deemed worthy of a superior wipe; a number two far too upmarket for any of that 1-ply supermarket-branded nonsense. antiques roadshow 1. n. Sunday teatime TV show featuring Fiona Bruce slumming it with the unwashed hordes. 2. n. A Saga holiday, possibly involving coach travel with repeated stops for the lavatory. arseterisk n. A brown punctuation mark left on the back of the bog seat by a previous inconsiderate or overweight sitter. bathroom nutmeg n. During a sit-down toilet adventure, the unfortunate practice of unknowingly wazzing through the gap between the seat and the porcelain, thus creating an awful…

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Viz (Digital) - 1 Issue, May 2023

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