HE COULDN'T HAVE GOTTEN a tribal tattoo like every other guy? No, the most telling sign that Grant Ellis wouldn't follow the usual trajectory as the Bachelor was the "lone wolf" inked on his forearm: "It symbolizes being alone," he explained - and it's about as far as you can get from a Neil Lane diamond. But somehow, in season 29, multiple love stories have unfolded for the 31-year-old basketball pro turned day trader. And on the eve of hometown dates (ABC, March 3, 8 P.M.), Us looks ahead to the blockbuster finale teased in the trailer, where he is so torn between his last two contestants that he's still unsure one hour before cameras roll on his final rose ceremony.
The sincere and sometimes silly Ellis, who first appeared on Jenn Tran's season of The Bachelorette in summer 2024, faced the ultimate decision, which he describes to Us as not the hardest but "the most important" of his life. The dilemma: Go with what his head was telling him... or what his heart was feeling? "When you intertwine logic and emotion, it's really tough," Ellis says. "I think you have to blend a little logic with a little emotion and ask, 'What's good for me?' and 'What feels right to me?' Finding that middle ground is challenging, but it's where you have to start." No matter where it ends, Ellis says the experience has been transformative. "Now I'm in a position where I don't have to be lonely anymore," he says. "I think that's a love story in itself." Here, in a telling discussion with Us, the Bachelor reflects on that emotional moment of truth, how he got there and what's next.
Prior to this process, did you believe someone could be in love with more than one person at the same time? I didn’t think it was possible, but it is. You probably should avoid it, though. [Laughs.]
You didn’t: You fell for multiple women. Definitely. And at the end, making the decision that was best for me was something I really had to consider.
Obviously this is not normal, but it’s the show format. Did you worry about leading any of the women on while trying to find your match? It’s very hard in this role when you develop feelings and then tell people how you feel. You’re honest and sincere, and you try not to hold back — because that’s the way you find your person — but it’s easy to be villainized because you don’t want to lead anybody on. A man dating multiple women is already at a disadvantage. You just have to be careful and see where the cards fall.
Speaking of careful, how did you approach saying the L-word — or not? My plan was to go in and lead with my heart. I know I’m a pretty sound thinker and I use logic, but emotions are a different thing.
Was guilt a problem for you? I don’t think I felt guilty in the sense of developing feelings. I felt guilty for letting somebody down. It’s not every day you fall for more than one person. But there’s always gonna be a stronger feeling for [one of them].
Looking back to when you were growing up, what did your mom, Renee, teach you about love? She’s enough of a believer that she signed you up for The Bachelorette in the first place! What I learned from her relationship [with my dad, Robert] was that love is a choice, but you have to know when enough is enough. Love has to be reciprocated.
It’s been inspiring to see the way you’ve mended your relationship with your father, who struggled with substance abuse and addiction and was absent from your life for a long time. When you’re a kid, you think your parents could do no wrong. But then you grow up and you start to realize they’re human, they make mistakes, they need to learn and grow. I’m proud of my dad and where he’s at.
image [https://cdn.magzter.com/1494518166/1740557263/articles/4D95BUrxx1740689812565/0660412667.jpg]
Throughout the course of the season, you see my relationship with my father come into play. [At the very end], he comes back and gives me some really solid advice — that’s something I’ve been looking for my whole life, and it’s something that helped me get over the edge to make my decision. He’s able to come back in my life and help me when I need it the most.
Sounds like The Bachelor boosted your mental health in some ways. You’ve been candid about your loneliness and finding solace in basketball — “just me and the net.” Is that feeling gone for good? Yeah, being on the show really helped me talk about things that plagued me in the past. As the season progresses, you see how this show was like a big therapy session for me. Aside from me going on there trying to find love, it helped me understand my feelings and my trauma and really open up.
What was your biggest fear going in? Being in a situation where I didn’t make the right decision or my judgment wasn’t what I thought it was. That’s scary. But I stuck to my guns, stuck to myself, and I think everything played out well.
In general, what do you think the qualities are that make a good Bachelor? Patience and understanding. You have to have a level head because certain things will happen throughout the journey that you can’t predict and that you have no say over. You have to be able to sit back and figure out the best move to make at that moment.
What are your non- negotiables in a spouse? No. 1 is just somebody who’s not too self-absorbed. I want somebody who cares for people and who has a good heart. And I feel like that makes a really good partner because when I come home from work, I’m gonna cook for you and I’m gonna do certain things, but I also want you to think about me, too. The relationship has to be a balance of both.
No shade, but were you worried about trying to find someone in the Bachelor world who wasn’t going to be a little self-absorbed? Honestly, I wasn’t. I think that I’m a pretty good judge of character. And as long as we have a foundation, we could always learn and grow together.
Fans have also seen you sing, rap and play piano on the series. Is showing that side of you a way to express your vulnerability — and are you surprised at the criticism that’s been hurled at you?
Creativity helps get rid of stress and depression. But it is vulnerable. I didn’t expect the backlash I was gonna receive. I’m not trying...
The sincere and sometimes silly Ellis, who first appeared on Jenn Tran's season of The Bachelorette in summer 2024, faced the ultimate decision, which he describes to Us as not the hardest but "the most important" of his life. The dilemma: Go with what his head was telling him... or what his heart was feeling? "When you intertwine logic and emotion, it's really tough," Ellis says. "I think you have to blend a little logic with a little emotion and ask, 'What's good for me?' and 'What feels right to me?' Finding that middle ground is challenging, but it's where you have to start." No matter where it ends, Ellis says the experience has been transformative. "Now I'm in a position where I don't have to be lonely anymore," he says. "I think that's a love story in itself." Here, in a telling discussion with Us, the Bachelor reflects on that emotional moment of truth, how he got there and what's next.
Prior to this process, did you believe someone could be in love with more than one person at the same time? I didn’t think it was possible, but it is. You probably should avoid it, though. [Laughs.]
You didn’t: You fell for multiple women. Definitely. And at the end, making the decision that was best for me was something I really had to consider.
Obviously this is not normal, but it’s the show format. Did you worry about leading any of the women on while trying to find your match? It’s very hard in this role when you develop feelings and then tell people how you feel. You’re honest and sincere, and you try not to hold back — because that’s the way you find your person — but it’s easy to be villainized because you don’t want to lead anybody on. A man dating multiple women is already at a disadvantage. You just have to be careful and see where the cards fall.
Speaking of careful, how did you approach saying the L-word — or not? My plan was to go in and lead with my heart. I know I’m a pretty sound thinker and I use logic, but emotions are a different thing.
Was guilt a problem for you? I don’t think I felt guilty in the sense of developing feelings. I felt guilty for letting somebody down. It’s not every day you fall for more than one person. But there’s always gonna be a stronger feeling for [one of them].
Looking back to when you were growing up, what did your mom, Renee, teach you about love? She’s enough of a believer that she signed you up for The Bachelorette in the first place! What I learned from her relationship [with my dad, Robert] was that love is a choice, but you have to know when enough is enough. Love has to be reciprocated.
It’s been inspiring to see the way you’ve mended your relationship with your father, who struggled with substance abuse and addiction and was absent from your life for a long time. When you’re a kid, you think your parents could do no wrong. But then you grow up and you start to realize they’re human, they make mistakes, they need to learn and grow. I’m proud of my dad and where he’s at.
image [https://cdn.magzter.com/1494518166/1740557263/articles/4D95BUrxx1740689812565/0660412667.jpg]
Throughout the course of the season, you see my relationship with my father come into play. [At the very end], he comes back and gives me some really solid advice — that’s something I’ve been looking for my whole life, and it’s something that helped me get over the edge to make my decision. He’s able to come back in my life and help me when I need it the most.
Sounds like The Bachelor boosted your mental health in some ways. You’ve been candid about your loneliness and finding solace in basketball — “just me and the net.” Is that feeling gone for good? Yeah, being on the show really helped me talk about things that plagued me in the past. As the season progresses, you see how this show was like a big therapy session for me. Aside from me going on there trying to find love, it helped me understand my feelings and my trauma and really open up.
What was your biggest fear going in? Being in a situation where I didn’t make the right decision or my judgment wasn’t what I thought it was. That’s scary. But I stuck to my guns, stuck to myself, and I think everything played out well.
In general, what do you think the qualities are that make a good Bachelor? Patience and understanding. You have to have a level head because certain things will happen throughout the journey that you can’t predict and that you have no say over. You have to be able to sit back and figure out the best move to make at that moment.
What are your non- negotiables in a spouse? No. 1 is just somebody who’s not too self-absorbed. I want somebody who cares for people and who has a good heart. And I feel like that makes a really good partner because when I come home from work, I’m gonna cook for you and I’m gonna do certain things, but I also want you to think about me, too. The relationship has to be a balance of both.
No shade, but were you worried about trying to find someone in the Bachelor world who wasn’t going to be a little self-absorbed? Honestly, I wasn’t. I think that I’m a pretty good judge of character. And as long as we have a foundation, we could always learn and grow together.
Fans have also seen you sing, rap and play piano on the series. Is showing that side of you a way to express your vulnerability — and are you surprised at the criticism that’s been hurled at you?
Creativity helps get rid of stress and depression. But it is vulnerable. I didn’t expect the backlash I was gonna receive. I’m not trying...
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Us Weekly (Digital) - 1 Issue, March 10, 2025