Eureka! My Archimedes moment

When the water ran out of the hotel bath, I made a genius discovery

JEM CLARKE

My mother and I – while often at war – have much in common. We both live at the same address. We both sponge money off the same 88-year-old man. And we both have completely messed up body-washing routines. Specifically, my mother can no longer lie in a bath, and I can no longer stand in the shower. Being only five foot long, I can actually float in a standard bath. Sometimes, I wish I had more body area to scrub, as I told Father. Noting my piled-on paunch, he observed, 'You're working on that one, though, aren't you, son?' My preferred modus operandi for a bath is dimmed lighting and disastrously loud radio, as I have to take out my hearing aids. Radio 4 Extra blares the abridged Dickens…

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The Oldie (Digital) - 1 Issue, April 2025

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