'My grief for my daughter is just my love for her'

From climbing the world's highest mountains to completing the toughest survival endurance races, Ashley Cain has certainly earned his ultra athlete status. And while he may look hard as nails, the former footballer does it all in memory of his late daughter, Azaylia, who passed away at just eight months old from leukaemia.
Ashley's ex-partner Safiyya Vorajee gave birth to Azaylia in August 2020 and the baby girl was diagnosed with cancer at eight weeks old. In the years following Azaylia's passing, he and Safiyya, who split up in March 2022, have raised millions for children with cancer via their charity, The Azaylia Foundation.
As we sit down for an exclusive chat, Ashley, 34, has just recovered from his incredible Ultraman feat, which saw him become the first person in history to run, then cycle and then kayak the length of Great Britain in 80 days.
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Detailing why he's so passionate about projects like these, Ashley says, "I don't want any child to have to feel my daughter's pain. I was on those wards and I'd look in my room and see my daughter smiling at me, not knowing how bad her illness was. I used to walk out of my room and see all the beautiful children that are going through the same fight.
"No child should have to battle cancer and no family and parents should have to lose their child. So for me, that's the first thing I think about when I wake up in the morning. That's why I do these challenges -to raise awareness and to raise funds for the foundation in the hope that it can make a difference." Not only is Ashley making a difference, but he admits that pushing himself to his limits also brings him closer to his daughter.
"When I'm on these challenges and when I'm isolated for days, I'm going through pain and at the point where I'm about to break -they are the times when I connect with her the most because I talk to her," says Ashley, with a smile.
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"I talk to her all day and then I see the sky at the end of that day and I know she's with me and I'm going to be safe. No matter how much pain I go through, it's not as bad as the pain she went through. I love her more than anything that's willing to stop me, so I'll always push through.
"When you lose a child, you go through different stages of grief and in the first place it's really raw because she's not there in front of you. Then you start forgetting what she smells like and what she feels like. You feel guilty because you can't do anything for your child-this is something I can do for her." While Ashley has had his hands full with physical challenges, he is also a father of two young sons - Aliyas, who turns one this week, and one-month-old Atlas - and has just marked his first Christmas with them.
Lighting up at the mention of them, Ashley says, "They're absolutely gorgeous - they are really helping heal my heart. Don't get me wrong, they can keep you up at night, but it's all worth it.
I'm so grateful for them." Growing up as part of a closeknit family, the reality star, who has appeared in shows such as Celebrity SAS: Who Dares Wins and The Real Full Monty, is keen to ensure his sons form a special bond and says they already have a "beautiful relationship". "I know Azaylia would be absolutely besotted by them and they will by her when I tell them all of the stories about her," he says.
Keeping Azaylia's memory alive is something Ashley is passionate about and he says he often visits her resting place with Aliyas and A...