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33 Articles

The Power of Pride

My dad came out as gay when I was 6 years old. It was Georgia in the ’90s, and as a teacher working with public schools, the stakes for him were high. This was before the days of Will & Grace, a wildly popular show that enlightened the world around us by featuring two gay leading roles. Before RuPaul’s Drag Race brought drag out of the taboo shadows and into an increasingly welcoming spotlight. Before the Supreme Court’s Obergefell v. Hodges ruling secured the right for same-sex couples across the country to marry. (My dad had to wait 25 years for that—he’s now married to my stepdad Gary, an artist.) It was a radically different time, and as I think about the kids growing up now, I am so grateful…

The Power of Pride

Morning, Sunshine! Here’s the Literal First Thing You Should Do

1. Congrats, we’re gonna give your life a musical score! Which mood is most appropriate? a Whatever was playing in the background of those Tom and Jerry chase sequences. b Any Y2K pop-rock. All headbangers all the time. c Hmm, something from a gospel choir? 2. How do you make it through the brutal post-lunch slump? a An in-depth social media scroll. b As prolific thought leader Rihanna once said, “I gotta get my body moving.” c Power naps. Obviously. 3. You just checked off the final item on your aggressively long to-do list. You are now: a Bring me happy hour! And an hour-long call with an unsuspecting relative to bitch about my day! b Riding a self-care wave. c Can you please just let me enjoy this mindless TV bender? 4. Think hard on this. Which app do you use…

Morning, Sunshine! Here’s the Literal First Thing You Should Do

If You Wanna Be My Lover, You Gotta Get With My Queue

The Good Witch, by Maisie Peters June 16 Ed Sheeran’s musical protégé and BFF perfectly avoids any sophomore slump in her high-energy second album, pivoting away from love songs into her own Reputation era. (Yes, Taylor Swift is a fan.) With lyrics like “I still love you but you’re taking me/From your arms/Back to therapy,” Maisie proves she’s ready for a bigger spotlight—and that none of her exes are safe. City on Fire May 12, Apple TV+ OG Gossip Girl creators Josh Schwartz and Stephanie Savage are back again—with another soapy-as-hell NYC drama. A college student, played by Bodies Bodies Bodies star Chase Sui Wonders, is shot in Central Park. But the real mystery in the whodunit that follows isn’t who killed her…it’s how she’s connected to a series of fires around the city. Past Lives June…

If You Wanna Be My Lover, You Gotta Get With My Queue

WE ARE TOO MANY, by Hannah Pittard May 2 A hilarious and very real memoir (kind of) about a wife, her husband, and the other woman. YELLOWFACE, by R. F. Kuang May 16 What’s one way to talk about racism and cultural appropriation in publishing? Write a novel about it. BIG GAY WEDDING, by Byron Lane May 30 A Southern community has to adjust its attitude when a same-sex wedding comes to town. LOVE, THEORETICALLY, by Ali Hazelwood June 13 Witness two adorable scientists fall in love after pretending to date in this romance Emily Henry fans will love. CLOCKWISE FROM TOP LEFT: COURTESY OF A24; EMILY ARAGONES/20TH CENTURY STUDIOS; CARLOS LOPEZ-CALLEJA/DISNEY; COURTESY OF HENRY HOLT BOOKS; COURTESY OF PENGUIN RANDOM HOUSE; COURTESY OF HENRY HOLT BOOKS; COURTESY OF WILLIAM MORROW; COURTESY OF NETFLIX; DUSAN MARTINCEK/NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC FOR DISNEY; ZACH DILGARD/APPLE TV+.…

So I Talked to Sasha Velour and…

Sasha Velour has a résumé as long as my arm: contestant on RuPaul’s Drag Race season 9 (which she won!), creator of the wildly popular burlesque show NightGowns, author of the brand-spanking-new The Big Reveal: An Illustrated Manifesto of Drag. She’s also delightfully down for a good time, making her perfect for this series, where we interview our favorite celebs after hours and ask them borderline-inappropriate questions. Here’s what happened when Sasha took a break from her vaginal-jewelry-making to answer them. Sasha, congrats on finally getting to the weekend. What were you doing right before this call? I was sanding some jewelry that I made with a friend the other night. I surprised her with mushroom tea and insisted we make vaginal jewelry—earrings—out of Sculpey. “I like to sleep in a fantasy bordello.” How…

So I Talked to Sasha Velour and…

Critical Thinking

“What’s new about the fragile white guy?” you’re probably saying. “Haven’t we already had a bajillion of those in the history of film?” Thanks for asking, and yes. Joaquin Phoenix dancing on those stairs as the Joker, Adam Sandler as Howie in Uncut Gems, Jesse Plemons as Jake in I’m Thinking of Ending Things, hell, even Robert De Niro as Travis Bickle way back in 1976’s Taxi Driver—all damaged male characters just trying to be good but the society we live in won’t allow it and isn’t that sad? Hot take: not really. And you know who seemingly agrees? The people behind Hollywood’s latest versions of onscreen male vulnerability. New films like Fair Play and Cat Person don’t reinforce the white-men-as-victims trope. They’re not thinly veiled attempts to encourage audiences to…

Critical Thinking

How I Cracked the Code for Finding Amazing Plus-Size Formalwear

When I tell you I’ve been on a years-long quest, I mean I’ve ordered dozens and dozens of fancy plus-size dresses online, banged my head against what feels like every fitting room wall out there, and spent countless hours researching options for myself, my mom, and my friends—for my own wedding and the 10 weddings I’ve attended in the past two years alone. I mean, seriously, formalwear is hard enough when you have to factor in the weather, the event’s setting, and specific dress codes (or lack thereof—hi, page 27). But it’s beyond frustrating when you’re a size 14 or higher. What you’ll typically find is dowdy. Or Dancing With the Stars–level sparkly with cutouts and high slits that are decidedly not bra-, Spanx-, or underwear-friendly. (Going commando can be complicated…

How I Cracked the Code for Finding Amazing Plus-Size Formalwear

Your Resortwear Era Is Now

Tourist Mode! Going full dad-on-vacation has somehow taken a detour from tacky to straight-up elevated. It’s the details that sell it. Woven! For when you just need to be at the beach (if only in your mind). Swim Cutouts! Bikini energy with a lower probability of wardrobe malfunctions. Sunset Ombré! Here’s a fact: Nothing can make your summer outfits come alive more than a warm-tone gradient look can. FROM LEFT: GETTY IMAGES; COURTESY OF ROWEN ROSE; GETTY IMAGES; COURTESY OF JACQUEMUS; GETTY IMAGES (2); THOMAS DE CRUZ MEDIA/COURTESY OF COURRÈGES; LAUNCHMETRICS.COM/SPOTLIGHT. ALL ITEMS COURTESY OF BRANDS.…

Your Resortwear Era Is Now

What to Wear When You’re Invited to a Wedding Where You Don’t Know Anyone Else and Your Date Forgot What the Dress Code Is

Watch this outfit come together with TikTok magic!…

What to Wear When You’re Invited to a Wedding Where You Don’t Know Anyone Else and Your Date Forgot What the Dress Code Is

cosmo’s holy grail beauty awards

makeup 1. BEST LIPSTICK “As soon as you swipe on this bold matte, the pigments lock onto your lips for 10 (!) hours of smooth, smudgeproof wear.” —BETH GILLETTE, BEAUTY EDITOR Nars Powermatte Lipstick, $34, sephora.com 2. BEST TINTED MOISTURIZER “The OG version is just a *tad* too dewy for my oily skin, but this new one with a matte finish is perfection.” —LAUREN BALSAMO, DEPUTY BEAUTY DIRECTOR Bare Minerals Complexion Rescue Natural Matte Tinted Moisturizer, $37, sephora.com 3. BEST EYELINER “I can’t get over how easily this creamy pencil glides across my lids and lash lines. The level of color payoff you get is also unreal.” —MEKITA RIVAS, EDITOR MAC Colour Excess Gel Pencil Eye Liner, $23, ulta.com 4. BEST CONCEALER “I bow down to this mid-weight concealer. It leaves my under-eyes brighter and smoother and feels like a serum…

cosmo’s holy grail beauty awards

Your Desire Style Is the Key to Hotter Foreplay

What if I told you there’s a way to hack your sex drive so that you can get horny—and stay that way—whenever you want? Yes, even these days, when just about everything feels like a libido killer (the looming maybe-recession, the constant attacks on our reproductive rights, never-ending work stress) and when getting your brain to chill out and focus on what feels good can be a particularly difficult task. The trick lies in identifying your desire style, aka your love language’s (much) sexier counterpart. Almost every turn-on can be categorized into one of five styles, according to sex expert Emily Morse, author of Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure: conversation, touch, visuals, play, and physical adventure. Think of each as a set of things…

Your Desire Style Is the Key to Hotter Foreplay

A Cautionary Tale About Celebrating With Exes

THURSDAY, 7 P.M. Work is absolutely wild right now. One of our department heads, Helga, has enacted a reign of terror and it’s making her entire team so inefficient that our leaders keep funneling projects my way. I barely have time to shower, let alone date. But I’m so excited to meet Naomi, the cute engineer I matched with last week, that I block off all of tomorrow evening on my calendar. Honestly, very few people I knew in college really explored their sexuality then, and now there’s a wave of my friends ready to go there. Outside of last year’s threesome date with Ethan and Heather, this is my first official dinner-and-drinks situation with a woman. I call my friend Kalani, a newly out and proud bisexual queen, for advice. She…

A Cautionary Tale About Celebrating With Exes

How to Actually Meet People in Person

Remember the days when people serendipitously exchanged numbers in line at a coffee shop? No? Yeah. For most of us, encountering romantic prospects looks a lot more like constant ghosting, promising matches that go nowhere, and a seemingly bottomless pool of options designed to keep us all on a never-ending quest for the next best thing. In short, we’ve basically grown up on Tinder, with algorithms running our love lives. But! Believe it or not, rom-com-worthy How We Met moments aren’t strictly a thing of the past—they do still happen today. (And because you’re asking, no, it’s not always creepy to approach a cute stranger in public. And yes, there are ways to talk to another human without seeming awkward or desperate.) To reassure you and honestly also ourselves, we asked people…

How to Actually Meet People in Person

Making a Meet-Cute

Get Thyself Out There Anywhere people are gathering to enjoy shared hobbies is a place your ready-to-mingle self wants to be. This might mean joining a local running club or browsing Eventbrite for fun stuff in your area. Make the First Move Strike up a chat with a stranger, and don’t overthink it! A simple “hi” goes further than you think, especially if you’re already in a place where people have similar interests. Introduce yourself, ask them what brought them there, and let the convo flow. Keep an Open Mind Instead of getting hung up on finding a romantic connection, focus on expanding your social circle in general and stay open to people outside your type. Sometimes the perfect person comes along when you least expect it—and in a package you never considered. Adorable date ideas…

Making a Meet-Cute

The Couples Therapist Will See You Now

Dear Minaa, For two seasons now, The White Lotus has been trying to ruin my marriage. Every time I witness one of its characters behaving badly (see: Tanya’s shitty partner, all the cheating millennials), I find myself giving my husband extreme side-eye and treating him as if he’s doing the same thing. Of course my spouse isn’t perfect, but I also know he’s not the monster I project onto him after each drama-filled episode. Or…is he? Are shows like this surfacing our own unspoken issues, however small, that should be aired? Or are they making me see insignificant problems through a needlessly exaggerated lens? Please send help! Dear Reader, Ask yourself what specific plot points seem to be triggering you. Is it infidelity or other kinds of betrayal? Is it physical or emotional…

The Couples Therapist Will See You Now

Unpopular Opinion: Travel Dupes Exist

Trade Denmark for… Solvang, California If you’re looking for walkable streets and window boxes overflowing with flowers, head to this spot. The danishes are actually Danish (get your wienerbrød at Brød & Kage and your æbleskiver at Solvang Restaurant), and the Corque Hotel’s outdoor firepits will warm your hygge-loving heart. Don’t leave town without shopping the very cool Scandi brands at the Copenhagen House. Trade the Swiss Alps for… Ouray, Colorado Some say the snow-capped San Juan Mountains scenery is reminiscent of the Swiss Alps (it’s us; we say it). The southwestern Colorado town’s crystal clear lakes and luxurious off-the-grid huts (they even cook for you at the Red Mountain Alpine Lodge!) are definitely worthy of a yodel or two, but it’s the truffes at Mouse’s Chocolates & Coffee that give us that sweet Swiss…

Unpopular Opinion: Travel Dupes Exist

It’s Not Easy to Step Away From the Fight When the Cause Is So Crucial. But It’s the Best Thing I Ever Did.

My body felt weathered. My skin and lymphatic system screamed with signs of inflammation. I’d been feeling an impossible tightness in my neck and shoulders and explosive pressure in my lower back. It was the summer of 2021, and I was at an appointment I’d booked with a chiropractor. As he felt across my body, looking for a place to begin, he locked eyes with me and said there wasn’t much he could do until I spoke with my therapist, who might be able to address what had me so tight in the first place. Not even a week later, my dermatologist said that stress was most likely causing the flare-ups on my skin. My mind, heart, and body had been on fire with the rage and heartache that consumed me…

It’s Not Easy to Step Away From the Fight When the Cause Is So Crucial. But It’s the Best Thing I Ever Did.

Hi, I Coordinate the ~Spicy~ Scenes on Your Fave TV Shows

The #MeToo movement spawned many things, including the urgent need for an entire profession: mine. As an intimacy coordinator, I work with film and TV crews to both choreograph sex scenes and advocate for actors’ physical and psychological safety. My goal is to create space for conversations about consent—let me tell you, on-set power dynamics are real—while making sure whatever we’re filming looks authentic. Honestly, my day-to-day is a weird mix of very sexy (actors are brilliant) and deeply unsexy (they’re taped up like Barbies), which can be…confusing for everyone. But I make it all a little easier and a lot more comfortable. It isn’t always glamorous—you wouldn’t believe how many genital barriers I’ve doled out over the years—but I love what I do and I hope to see my…

Hi, I Coordinate the ~Spicy~ Scenes on Your Fave TV Shows

Ask Me About the Time I Had to Get Rolled Off the Dance Floor at My Friend’s Wedding

A few years ago, I was a bridesmaid in my bestie’s wedding. It was a great time—friends reuniting, DJ spinning hit after hit—until I almost needed an ambulance called on my behalf. I’m not proud of it, but after a couple (dozen) sips of Adult Beverages, I agreed to a dance-off with the bride’s little sister. (I was a dancer growing up, and I’m a wee bit competitive.) Surrounded by a crowd, the two of us started battling, Step Up style. We went back and forth until an old hip-hop song came on and I decided to hit her with my signature move: the splits. Welp. Despite the forgiving slit in my bridesmaid dress, it did not go down as planned. Instead, I went down. Until I was crumpled on the…

Ask Me About the Time I Had to Get Rolled Off the Dance Floor at My Friend’s Wedding

I’m a bridesmaid in a Sunday wedding and I have a big presentation on Monday. Can I skip out early? Um, YES. Sorry to the bride, but other people’s major life events don’t stop while a wedding is in progress. Just try to make some memories with her before you leave. Am I allowed to play the explicit versions of songs at my wedding if kids are invited? I know, censored songs are just not the same. Because most kids will bounce early, spread the word that things will be PG-13 after 9 or 10 p.m., and parents can plan accordingly. My sister is 12 years younger and we’re not that close. Does she have to be my maid of honor? Definitely not. The big secret about weddings is that there are actually no rules,…

Just a Damn Good Dinner for When You’re in the Mood for Noods

Most of what I know about Korean cooking, I learned from watching my unofficial food fairy godmother, YouTube cook Maangchi. Through her channel, two cookbooks, and online community, she taught me—a Korean American adoptee raised by white parents—many lessons on my journey to discover more about my culture. Things like the savory superpowers of toasted sesame oil—every time I use it, I feel more Korean somehow. It’s almost as if the ingredient connects me to my birth parents and extended family back home. So I was already a toasted sesame oil devotee when the discovery of toasted sesame paste blew my mind. It has all the delicious nuttiness of the oil with a consistency that’s similar to jarred peanut butter. And it’s an absolutely essential condiment for the chilled sesame noodles…

Just a Damn Good Dinner for When You’re in the Mood for Noods

Leo Taurus season is a busy time for everyone, but that’s especially true for you. This is a critical moment for your career, and based on your performance, you could get a raise or even a promotion. In June, the love planets Venus and Mars are both in your sign, so you can also expect plenty of action. Sagittarius You usually have a dull Taurus season, and this year is no exception, thanks to your busy work life. But when Gemini season begins in late May, you’re being given chances to travel (your favorite thing) or try something new (your second favorite thing). Say yes to all of it! Virgo Even if you don’t want to admit it, you can be a little closed-minded. So it’s time to broaden your worldview. Is a springtime vacay…

Astrology Is My Bisexual Love Language

When I first started practicing astrology, the excitement over learning about my Sun, Moon, and Rising signs spilled over into all aspects of my life. The stars became poetic metaphors for emotions and experiences I couldn’t quite explain—but most of all, astrology became my teacher in love, helping me realize how to recognize care and respect. Eventually, I discovered it’s a pretty damn great bisexual dating tool too. Let me back up a bit to say that, obviously, dating in 2023 is…an adventure. Throwing astrology into the mix can helpfully queer expectations and dating patterns. Yes, I’m using “queer” as a verb here, meaning to move in deliberate opposition to and disruption of “traditional” ideas about gender and sexuality. Astrology, which has always been a space for magical play, can help…

Astrology Is My Bisexual Love Language

Come As You Are

Orville Peck “I’m a neoclassic cowboy who feels best in something classic or vintage mixed with a creative, modern twist. When I get dressed in the morning, it’s usually something really comfortable because if I have to perform that evening, it’s probably gonna be something really extra. I love cowboy hats and sheer fabrics.” —Orville Peck, 35, musician. Between his self-produced debut album, Pony; his 2020 EP, Show Pony; and his sophomore album, Bronco (sensing a theme here?), he’s making country music gay, and thank god. Kade Gottlieb “My favorite designers tell a story through their collections, and when people see my drag, that is exactly what I want: for them to see the journey I am on, good and bad. As a trans man, and with all the antitrans and anti-drag legislation happening…

Come As You Are

Madison Bailey Rises Up

One thing is abundantly clear after spending a few hours with Madison Bailey: She isn’t interested in wearing a mask that grins and lies, as poet Paul Laurence Dunbar once wrote. She’d much prefer to show the truth of her reality and to live in a world where that’s the norm. “If everyone were just 10 percent more honest, we would see a lot of shit changing,” she says over lunch at a French bistro just outside Los Angeles. “I want to be respected. I want people to think I’m glamorous. I want people to see pictures of me and be like, ‘She’s stunning,’” she continues. “But I also want people to know that I don’t look like that every day. I’m not perfect, and I’m trying to show y’all I’m…

Madison Bailey Rises Up

SAY “BOOK BAN” ONE MORE TIME

Hi, if you’re new here (welcome!), rest assured that we are not. Cosmo has been battling regressive moral panic—and the censorship it can spawn—for decades. Over the years, various fringe groups have sought to censor us for printing “pornography” and “explicit content,” aka honest, informative reporting on totally normal physical intimacy and absolutely crucial sexual health topics. So you could say we are experts in defending the right to empower readers. Which is why we’re standing with the LGBTQ+ authors whose work is under fire right now from lawmakers and at least 50 groups agitating for book bans at the national, state, or local level. This isn’t just about Drag Story Hour or inclusive kids’ books anymore. (Although the challenges against both, against titles like And Tango Makes Three—the award-winning, completely…

SAY “BOOK BAN” ONE MORE TIME

On Feeling Sexy (or Not)

1. Couplets: A Love Story by Maggie Millner “Everyone had the same Ikea bed. She tied my wrists to hers, above my head. (She liked what she called clean lines, I would learn; her major had been architecture.)” 2. Girls Like Girls by Hayley Kiyoko “Out of the corner of my eye, I watch Sonya kick the beach ball into the water, stripping off her shirt as she bounds into the water, the white wake of her splash shining against the red of her bikini. My stomach dips as she disappears under the water, shimmering like a mermaid when she surfaces, and then I have to look away, because if I don’t, I’m going to go as scarlet as her bathing suit.” 3. Pretty Baby: A Memoir by Chris Belcher “The days got shorter and colder,…

On Feeling Sexy (or Not)

On Building a Better World

8. Gender Magic: Live Shamelessly, Reclaim Your Joy & Step Into Your Most Authentic Self by Rae McDaniel “If we focus only on easing suffering, we’re assuming that relief is the best thing a transgender or non-binary person can hope to achieve in their life. We lose out on the opportunity to connect on experiences like the joy of creative expression, pleasure in all its forms, laughing till we pee, and fiercely celebrating each other.” 9. The Big Reveal: An Illustrated Manifesto of Drag by Sasha Velour “If spiteful politicians were ever to drive us from the public libraries and stages, we’d still have our bars. If we were driven from our bars, we would have our parties and our parks, our bodies and lives. Part of drag’s history is the fact that…

On Building a Better World

On Figuring Ourselves Out

13. Horse Barbie: A Memoir by Geena Rocero “Sometimes I second-guessed my modeling dreams. Still, I found affirmation in the fullness of my feminine expression, where I felt my power. So many voices in society had told me to act a certain way, dress a certain way, think a certain way, be a certain way. Modeling was my way of trying to define my own womanhood—to free myself from those cages.” 14. Nobody Needs to Know: A Memoir by Pidgeon Pagonis “Learning I was intersex had opened me up to understanding myself, and sex and gender, in new and broader ways…. I felt both exhausted and filled with appreciation for being able to learn more and share my story for the first time in person with others like me—others who had similar journeys.” 15.…

On Figuring Ourselves Out

On Finding Family

20. I Keep My Exoskeletons to Myself: A Novel by Marisa Crane “You’re going to be a great mother because you’re you, you once said. We kissed and I silently thanked you for your most magnificent lie to date. I remember giving your ass a little spank to show you that I would always be fun and kinky, despite my pathologies. You didn’t react. Instead, you said, I hope our kid wants to be our friend. It would have been the saddest thing in the world if it were coming out of someone else’s mouth. Out of yours, it sounded like an incantation.” 21. A Place for Us: A Memoir by Brandon J. Wolf “Pulse embodied the sense of community I had discovered after moving to Orlando. It was one of the first…

On Finding Family

On Channeling a Vibe

25. Bellies: A Novel by Nicola Dinan “I’ll dance anyway, because this world is open and possible. And it’s a party without the burden of personal history, without people who knew me as a boy and, I suspect, deep down, still see me as one. I laugh. I hold hands with Deandra, another friend from my course. She’s a few years older than me. Her long black hair is in two French plaits. I sing along. Some wine spills onto the parquet floors. Carte blanche! Vita nova! Dua Lipa!” 26. Quietly Hostile: Essays by Samantha Irby “I was splitting an apartment with this chaotic old gay man and neither of us could afford HBO when Sex and the City premiered, so I had to do what broke bitches did in 1998: wait for…

On Channeling a Vibe

ARE YOU MY CONVERSION THERAPIST?

I think I’d like to try adult conversion therapy. It was during a romantic after-dinner walk with my new wife that the scheme bobbed to the surface, putrid and captivating. Let us test the powers of this gay love, went my thoughts, a deranged cackle rising in my chest. Let us observe whether a counselor can awaken me to the wonders of a cishet existence. I squeezed Nat’s hand in silent apology for the unhinged experiment to come, another Cosmo story idea too ridiculous, too wrong to resist. This could be it, our final moonlit stroll before the whole marriage vanished in a puff of straight pride. Mind you, no kind of conversion therapy—the pseudoscience of trying to forcibly alter a person’s sexual orientation and/or gender identity—has ever “worked” on anyone, despite…

ARE YOU MY CONVERSION THERAPIST?

Bringing It Back

THE WHO Lady Gaga THE WHAT Our April 2010 cover story THE WHY Stefani Germanotta started the first decade of the 21st century singing at tiny NYC dive bars. She ended it performing “Bad Romance” for millions as Lady Gaga. Her Cosmo cover came at a very particular moment in time—before the meat dress but after her first Grammys sweep—when she was already selling out arenas worldwide…and outlining a few goals that might just reaffirm your belief in the power of manifestation. THE WORDS “I had a boyfriend who told me I’d never succeed, never be nominated for a Grammy, never have a hit song, and that he hoped I’d fail. I said to him, ‘Someday you won’t be able to order a cup of coffee at the fucking deli without hearing me.’” LADY GAGA Photographed by Kenneth Willardt…

Bringing It Back

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